6 Things to Stop So Happiness Can Start

Carly BensonPersonal Development

stop sign, stop start

Please don’t take this advice as me being bossy or condescending. These epiphanies are the lessons I have had to learn, practice and continue to have to remind myself of on the regular. I share them with realness in hopes that you can begin to live life at a new level by implementing these suggestions on what to stop and what to start.

Let’s stop getting ready to get ready.  Are you ready? Like really ready?

1) Stop trying to impress others.

I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of trying to prove my worth in this world where there will always be someone who is prettier, thinner, smarter, richer or funnier. I’ve decided that I’m going to work with what God gave me and I’m going to stop trying to be anything I’m not for the benefit of others.

Put yourself out there, but make sure it is the real you. Anyone who is meant to be in your life will love you exactly as you are. Be authentic. Be the version of you that comes naturally. Genuine relationships will never be based on competition. People like charisma. Start showing yours.

2) Stop acting like an amateur.

Yea, you heard me right. Stop acting like an amateur and start acting like a professional. What ever it is you are trying to accomplish in your life, start taking it seriously. Do you think Lebron James or Tom Brady would be where they are without the mindset of a professional? I highly doubt it. They wake up early, they train, they hold themselves accountable and most importantly, they treat their passion with professionalism.

If you want to be a pro at something, and it could be anything, then start acting like one. Decide what you need to do to become what you’ve been dreaming of and act like someone who truly wants it.

3) Stop wanting without action.

That last one is a great lead into this little ditty. So many times I talk to people who want to make a change in their life, but they are not willing to take the actions necessary to get there.

[Tweet “Wanting without action will never turn a desire into reality.”]

If you want something be it a lifestyle change, weight loss, more money, a better job, etc – stop fantasizing and start taking action. Start to do your homework, research, make a plan, set goals and give yourself a timeframe to reach them.

4) Stop worrying.

If I added up all the time I’ve wasted with my worries, I could probably have another degree, if not two. Half the time we worry based on things that never end up happening. Rather than worry, we should focus that time and energy on action and positive thoughts.

When you catch yourself worrying about something – an outcome, a response, an answer – change the worry into your most favorable and desired situation. Take the worry and turn it into a vision of the perfect scenario instead.

Let’s stop worrying about what could go wrong. Stop focusing on the negative or pessimistic side of the spectrum and go hang out on the positive end of it. It may not always play out exactly how you want, but more times than not, it will never be as horrible as you imagine it in your head. Start focusing on what could go wonderfully right.

5) Stop repeating things that don’t work.

Wow, what a crazy idea. Sounds simple, right? Well that’s because it is! But we make it so much harder than it needs to be sometimes. If something is not working in your life and you are unhappy, then it’s time to take life off repeat and hit the shuffle button instead.

We get comfortable. We get fearful of the other side. We let our doubts keep us moving in a vicious circle. I talk to people all the time who desperately want to make changes, but they continue to do the same things over and over, repeating the patterns that put them where they are.

If you want to change your body, stop eating crap and start working out. If you want to get sober, stop putting chemicals in your body and start working on yourself from the inside out. If you want a new job, stop telling yourself it will get better and start sending your resume out. If you are in a relationship that is going no where, stop turning your cheek and start having some brutally honest conversations with yourself and your significant other.

A broken record never makes for a very pleasant experience.  If you don’t know or haven’t heard the definition of insanity, now would be a good time to look it up. Start shuffling!

6) Stop holding back.

We wait for the perfect timing. We wait for the perfect opportunity. We wait for the signs to lead us. Let’s stop holding back. You are the only person who truly knows what you want.  And you’ll also be the only one who is disappointed if you don’t get it. You are responsible for your life, your wants, your actions and how your live your life to attain your dreams.

Start saying how you really feel. There is no need to hide what is bursting at the seams inside of you. There will never be a perfect time. You have to go for it. The worst that can happen is a NO and that is ok because those no’s are  eventually going add up to a bigger YES.

We don’t ever lose by going after what we want.  We only lose by holding back. 

Holding back always leads to looking back, wishing and wondering what would have happened IF? Don’t let yourself get stuck in “what if” land.  Start pursuing what you want.  And be relentless about it.

Miracles Are Brewing…

carly benson

Photo Credit: Exhibit HG