Learning To Go With The Flow

Carly BensonPersonal DevelopmentLeave a Comment

learning to go with the flow carly benson

If you follow me on Instagram, you know I was just on an adventure on the West Coast with my dearest girlfriends. I used to be the type of person who planned out every detail of a trip like this. I’d have dinners, shows, DJ’s and sights to see, scoped out well in advance. I would have my hotel confirmations printed and the entire itinerary organized for me and anyone traveling with me, ensuring a proper schedule of events.

But not this time; not anymore.

I’m not exactly sure when this shift occurred, but I’ve dropped the need to plan things out and I’m learning to go with the flow by surrendering to what life has to offer in the moment.

The day before I was leaving, I didn’t have a ride to the airport because my usual chauffeur (aka my mom) was out of town. I didn’t have a hotel booked for my first night in Vegas nor did I know where I was heading when I landed. I didn’t have my rental car booked for the last leg of my trip. I didn’t have much of any thing planned in all honesty. All I knew were the destinations – Vegas/Palm Springs/San Diego – along with a few scattered plans for the 8-night adventure. And I wasn’t worried in the slightest.

I’ve learned over time that things always work out. Sometimes better than they could have if I tried to carefully craft all the details like I used to. The more I’ve followed and implemented this theory, the more I’ve been convinced that things have a way of working out just as they are supposed to and most often better than I had planned.

I got a ride to the airport from a sweet friend.

I was offered to stay in a hotel room when I landed, for free.

I not only got a rental car the day before I needed it, but I showed up to an upgrade – a Benz was waiting for me fully equipped with satellite radio and navigation.

My girlfriends and I had suite booked at the Cosmopolitan in Vegas for the bachelorette party we were gathering for. When we showed up to check in, the guy at the hotel reception looked at his computer and then looked up at us in somewhat of disbelief only to tell us a few moments later with a hint of shock that we had “definitely been upgraded.”

Somehow, we were upgraded to the Penthouse on the top floor! We had a butler and an orientation on how to work all the fancy things in our baller accommodations. BOOM. We couldn’t have planned that if we tried.

None of this was planned. God worked all of it out. Much better than I ever could have if I spent months planning it.

My point isn’t too boast about my trip, but to demonstrate how things have a tendency to work out for us if we trust and allow the universe to do its thing for us. Not only that, but upgrades happen when we’re in the flow.

There is no need to plan out all the details of every corner of our lives. Jobs, relationships, marriages, babies – God has his timing for everything under the sun. And no matter how much we plan, force, formulate, blueprint, draft or try to make things happen as we see fit, I’ve learned it just doesn’t work that way.

Sure, we can have a clear vision of our desires, but surrendering to God’s plan, timing and greatest good on our lives, opens us up to receive blessings and miracles we may not realize are on our path.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m a fan of having plans/direction/goals, being a hard worker and “making shit happen,” but I’ve also learned the beauty of making moves within the intelligence of the flow. This is where synchronicity and serendipity have a chance to wow us with their ability to deliver life to us in bigger, better and more generous ways than we could have imagined. This can only happen when we allow life to unfold naturally sans the immaculate planning tactics on paper or in our heads.

Life is full of energy and energy is full of flow. It’s more natural to try to mimic this than it is to try to fight the universal energy of life. We don’t see a sunset struggling to set; it just melts down into the horizon. We don’t see the ocean struggling to make waves; it just moves within it’s natural FLOW. It’s when we struggle by forcing things to be the way we have it in our minds that we miss the beauty of the life-force trying to happen FOR us.

I heard a quote the other day by the stunning Gabby Bernstein that resonated with me as I prepared to share on this topic. She said:

“The secret to prayer is to stop praying for what YOU think you need.”

How about instead we pray for guidance.

Pray for abundance.

Pray to be lead in a way that would surpass our wildest dreams.

When we shift our mindset from needing to have all the details unfold exactly as we want, we open ourselves up to being spirit-lead. This makes things so much more enjoyable because when you learn to live in this way, you begin to have an ingrained sense that your needs will be met. Additionally, you begin to see that your wants start to blow your mind with how they are being upgraded on the regular in an organic way.

Not only that, but living in the flow helps us to drop our expectations and take life as it is served to us without any preconceived notions of what should be happening. This helps us to be more present, more mindful and ultimately experience more joy. Because let’s face it:

Planning leads to expectations and those gnarly things are often the precursors to disappointment.

Going with the flow doesn’t make you lazy, submissive or a dead fish. It simply means you are co-creating with God by responding, not just complying, with what life throws at you.

It’s becoming a cosmic warrior and intuitive listener.

It’s ditching the need to control and plan everything and instead trusting that the waves of life are going to show up for you intelligently.

It’s learning to swim with those waves, floating in their forward moving current, and allowing them to move you in the direction you should be going.

It means we stop trying to force or resist and learn how to vibe with the ever present ebb and flow of life.

I may have this “go with the flow” art mastered in my travels and adventures, but I assure you I’m far from a master at this in all aspects of life. They always say we teach what we need to learn. I’m learning to go with the flow one wave at a time and I can tell you that the more I let go and allow, the freer I feel.

So, the next time you are tempted to plan things out to a T for something, take a deep breath and instead try surrendering to the divine planning, timing and blessings that are in store for you by praying for guidance, abundance and to have your mind blown.

Our days are numbered before we arrive on this earth. The creator of the entire universe has carefully crafted the plans for our lives far in advance. He knows the number of grains of sand on the beaches, the number of hairs on your head and exactly how your days will be ordered. If He can create something as magnificent and majestic as the universe, I have a good hunch that He knows what He is doing with each of our lives.

Learning to go with the flow is tricky and scary, but it’s also extremely rewarding. Master this and life opens up in miraculous ways.

Trust. Allow. Surrender to the flow and dare to ride the waves. Surfs up, dude!